Boys vs. girls...a personality or gender thing?
Today was my youngest's second birthday, and with her older brother's birthday also right around the corner (that's a different post for a different day), I've been doing a lot of reflecting on the past few years. I was so excited to find out that we were having a girl, and thought, "Yay! One of each!" Don't get me wrong, I LOVE having a boy and girl, but find that I'm always thinking about the differences in them at their ages, and comparing Hailey's behavior and abilities to those of Luke when he was that age. And while there's a lot of similarities, there are also a lot of differences between the two as well.
First of all, it's still hard for me to believe that's it's already BEEN two years since she came into our lives. It still feels like yesterday that I decided to go for a walk with my husband and son because I had a "feeling", and four hours later, there she was. She was the tiniest thing I had ever held at just 7 lbs even, and even though I had been prepared with lots and lots of clothing ahead of time, we still had to go out and buy her size "premie" because her newborn clothing was huge on her. Little did we know what a force this little one was going to be.
Now you always hear everyone say how different boys are from girls, girls are "girly" and like princess stuff and tutus and pink, etc...boys like dirt, and trucks, and wrestling-you know, the usual stereotypes. And I have seen some truth in that, but my little Missy also loves dirt, and trucks, and her latest obsession, rocks. Give her rocks and she's content. Whether it's because her big brother loves all those things or if it's on her own accord, one never knows but she is just as much of a tomboy as she is a girly girl. The biggest difference I've noticed between boys and girls (through my own)?
The ATTITUDE. I know every child has his or her own personality, but boy oh boy, those girls are all about the sass! Now, Luke was always an easy-going baby and even toddler until he was about two-and-a-half years old. Almost always did what he was asked, rolled with the punches easily with little or no fits, didn't use the word "no", and whereas he liked to do things himself at times, he also was happy to have us help if offered. Hailey on the other hand? Almost since about 14 months, she's developed such a fierce independent streak in her that while admirable, also can be so very frustrating at times-like when you NEED to get out the door this instant and she has to insist putting her shoes on herself (which often go on the wrong feet), walk down the stairs out the door unassisted, and gets VERY angry if you pick her up and carry her to speed things up. It's all very adorable that she wants to (and often can) do a lot of things herself, but is also so very different from what we're used to with her brother. He never had fits and started crying if we helped him with doing things, or told us "no" every.single.chance. he got (or laughed at us and said it again when we give the stern face). He never tried to get all cutesy when we told him no or corrected him on something he shouldn't be doing-something Hailey does to no end. It's like she knows she can be pretty stinkin' cute, and tries QUITE OFTEN to use it to her advantage to get out of trouble. Boys-beware!
And the evil laugh...she's got that mastered and often uses it just after she's successfully managed to push her brother's buttons yet AGAIN. Because yes, between the two of them? She totally wears the pants and can bend her brother to her will very easily or else. But as evil as that laugh is, she makes up for in some of THE BEST kisses and hugs, ALL THE TIME. She has quite a little love bug personality that I wouldn't change for the world, and as much as they go head-to-head, they also have a lot of pretty adorable moments where you can see that underneath it all, they love and adore one another!
We know a huge difference between the two relates to the fact that she has a big brother to shadow and parrot-Luke didn't. She wants to do everything he does, by herself, and often repeats everything that comes out of his mouth, as well (often to Luke's frustration). That's what older siblings are for-to be role models, and I think that's where part of her independent streak stems from is just wanting to keep up with him. She's done some things at a significantly younger age than he did, but Luke didn't have an older sibling doing all the cool, "big kid" things that he wanted to keep up with on a daily basis. He had no one to show him the ropes. She does, however, and she can't do it all fast enough! It's amazing to step back and observe it all each day, and while I love that she can do all these things by herself, the mom in me is screaming "SLOW DOWN! YOU'RE DOING IT ALL TOO FAST! STOP GETTING SO BIG!" I mean come on, at the age of two, she can get undressed, re-dressed, put her shoes on, and climb up and buckle herself into her booster seat. At TWO (and some of those things she's been doing for a while)!!
Funny story, we were at my parents house, and the kids were outside playing with my dad while he did some work in the garden. Luke stumbled across a slug in the driveway, and his immediate reaction was to run it over with the tire of his bike. Totally normal for a kid that age-however, my dad said he started FREAKING OUT when he couldn't get the slug off the tire after that. Unfortunately, he suffers from his mother's OCD tendency to have everything just as he wants it (sorry bud), and literally couldn't function while that slug was stuck to his tire. Now apparently, his sister was in the background observing all this and Grandpa was telling Luke to just ride the bike and it would fall off or take something (or even just use his finger) and flick it off and that was apparently too gross an option for him to do. After about two minutes melting down over the slug being stuck, want to know what happened? Missy walked right up to the tire, took her finger, and flicked it off. Problem solved.
Enough said there about their personalities. It blows my mind that things have transformed so that of the two, she's the more easy-going. I never would have envisioned that in a million years.
Why is this important? It isn't. It's more just a written observation I have between my two little ones, because I find myself constantly wondering, is it a boy vs. girl difference, or is it more of a personality difference? I find myself wondering if anyone else with one of each gender experiences the same things. I'm sure to a degree it's a combination of both personality and gender, but I am very intrigued to see how things go when we decide to bring our third and final kiddo aboard. I can't wait to discover his/her personality, see the sibling dynamics change and grow yet again, and find out if he or she will fit more into the boy or girl stereotype, or, in taking after their older siblings, take on an adaptation of the two. Either way, I'm so very blessed to have the two wonderful kiddos that I do, and love the adventure that each day brings with them. <3
